Tuesday, April 10

CHALK TALK how to parent your kids (without losing your mind) part 2


Our recent Chalk Talk event, titled How To Parent Your Kids (Without Losing Your Mind), was jam-packed with great parenting tips. So jam-packed in fact, that we needed two blog posts to share all of our notes! Check out yesterday's post for part one and read the rest of  our notes here: 


Question: What are your recommendations for dealing with teens?

Answer:
  • “The I Don’t Care” Attitude. If you give your child a consequence for a bad behavior, say taking away their phone for a week, and they respond with “I don’t care,” trust me, they do. Respond with something like “Oh, Great! I was really worried that you would be upset. Well then how about we take it away for two weeks, since you just don’t care!”
  • The Driver's License: “No B’s, No Keys”. Starting at the end of 8th grade, tell your child that when they start high school you are going to be keeping track of all missing assignments or C or D’s or whatever you think is appropriate. For every missing assignment or C/D on a report card, push back getting their driver's license by one week.
  • “Why can’t I stay out all night?” Because of sex, jail, drugs and alcohol. Anything that happens after midnight when parents aren't around usually involves one of these things.
  • How do I deal with a teen who constantly wakes up disagreeable? Just say… a) "Well at least you have your health." or b) “Who are you and what have you done with my child!?"

Question: How do I reduce the amount of time I spend on the hunt for my child(ren)'s misplaced things, clothes, sports equipment, etc. 

Answer: Slightly off-the-wall parents NEVER EVER EVER look for kids stuff. Encourage your children to be independent and responsible by making them look themselves. Encourage them, but do not help them look. Make it a problem for them so next time they will put it somewhere they can find it. 

Question: My child is still attached to his/her pacifier. How do I wean him/her off of it? 

Answer: Tie the pacifier “binkie” to a string attached to a door knob far away from where you are or where their toys are. Day after day cut the string smaller and smaller and then finally cut a small slit in the tip of the pacifier.

Question: How do we (parents) keep “the love alive” in our relationship after having children?

Answer: 
  • Parents need to define themselves as lovers first! Being human is all about passion.
  • Children can drain the romance from a relationship really fast, but only if you let them.
  • 4 greatest secrets to keeping romance alive with kids is to:
    • Lie… in bed together
    • Cheat…on your budget--get away together
    • Steal… Time away from your daily routine – and spend time together
    • Divorce… Yourself of worries, of what you should do for your children. 
  • Parents who keep their intimate partner primary are happier and are better parents!

Question: What is a good age to start talking to your kids about sex ? 

Answer: From day one! Always have an open line of communication with your children. Make sure they from early on they feel comfortable talking to you. When you do have conversations about body parts make sure you are using the correct and proper terms, and not fluffy cutesy names. 

Question: Is it alright, if you are in the heat of the moment, to let your kids see you upset?

Answer: Yes. But make sure you are explaining to your children why you are upset, and what you need--a time-out, a walk, a bath, whatever it takes for you to calm down, just step away. Make sure you are using the correct terms to describe how you are really feeling: mad, frustrated, sad, angry, disappointed, etc.  Do the same for your children when they are upset; have them explain why they are upset and what they need. 

Learn more about Scott Peebles' parenting methods here

Contributed by Scott Peebles, M.A., MFCC, H.B. 

Monday, April 9

CHALK TALK how to parent your kids (without losing your mind) part 1



We were pleased to welcome acclaimed parenting speaker Scott Peebles to the Edgewood campus on April 3 to share his "slightly off-the-wall parenting" methods at our Chalk Talk event. Our parents were laughing out loud during his presentation and asked some excellent questions. Scott had so many great tips, we're sharing the notes in two parts--check back tomorrow for the second post! 

Question: What is the key to becoming a successful parent? 

Answer: 

  • Become a "Slightly Off-The-Wall Parent," which means doing things a little differently than might seem natural to you as a parent.
  • Be consistent. Say it once and follow through! Just making this one change in parenting will put you miles ahead of where you are. The key is “CONSISTENCY, CONSISTENCY, CONSISTENCY”
  • Keep this in mind: PMMFI “Please Make Me Feel Important.” Apply this rule to your children, your spouse and yourself. Everyone wants to feel important so make sure you are not only getting the attention you need but showing love and care for your partner and your children.

Question: How should I react/what do I do when my child brings home a bad grade?

Answer: 

Try a dialogue like this: 

  • Parent: “Great you got an F, isn’t that what you wanted?"
  • Child: “Well no, I wanted an A.” 
  • Parent: “Well did you study?”
  • Child: "Well, no..."

Emphasize that there are no failures, only results. You either get the results you want or the results you don’t want, and if you aren’t getting the results you want then you probably need to try doing something differently. 


Question: How do I interact with my kids in a way that instills confidence? 

Answer: 

  • Always look for the "gold" in your children. Make your child the star of the evening and give them the opportunity to talk as much as they want about all they things they are proud of.
  • Adopt the “Family Kindness Act” and every night or once a week at dinner have everyone in the family say two nice things about the other family members. Ask them, "What have you done today that you are proud of?” and let them talk.

Question: What do I do when my child starts throwing a tantrum?

Answer: 

  • Time them
  • Root them on--encourage them to keep on having a fit (reverse psychology)
  • Have a tantrum with them
  • Make a "Tantrum in Progress" sign to hold up if you are in public

Question: What is a good way to get my kids to bed on time?

Answer: Pick a song--make it one you like--and play it as they are getting ready for bed until they go to sleep. Over time... (ever heard of Pavlov?) they will start getting sleepy just by hearing the song.

Question: How do I say "No" without always saying no?

Answer: 

  • First, teach your children to respond to hearing "No" with the phrase that pays: "Thank you for considering, maybe next time?" Encourage your child  to respond in this way when you or anyone else says “no” to a request they have. 
  • Alternatives to No: 
    • Say Yes… Later 
    • “Give me a minute.”
    • “Convince me.” Have them think of a way to convince you, the answer still may be No but you have given them an opportunity to think through (i.e. “Dad, Can I borrow the car?” “No”  “Please Dad, I really need the car…”  “Ok, Convince me…” “Well, If you don’t let me drive the car then you will have to take me and all my friends to football practice..” “OK”)
  • Use the “Big No Sheet.” Basically, they say no, you say no. Make a big sheet, or list that you have in an easy-to-find place. When you ask your child to do something, a chore for example, and they say “no” you write it down on this sheet. Later when they ask you for something, go take a look at the sheet. “Well, it looks like you said “no” to doing the dishes, so no you don’t get to go out tonight”. Make it a problem for them. 

Contributed by Scott Peebles, M.A., MFCC, H.B. 

Friday, April 6

FRIDAY FOLDER april 6



Highlights From This Week
Upcoming Events 
High School/College Counselor Info Sessions
Anaheim Hill Campus - April 17, 6:30pm 
Edgewood Campus - April 24, 6:30pm
Mable Campus - April 18, 6pm

The key to preparing your child for success in the high school and college admissions process is starting early. In April, Fairmont Prep College Counselor Jonathan Dunn will visit our campuses to share his expertise and answer your questions about high school and college. You won't want to miss this informative presentation! 

Highlights Include:
* What you may not realize about junior high
* What every parent should know about high school
* What your high school counselor should do for your student
* What is important when choosing a college
* How to prepare for college  

Fairmont Parent Survey 
You should have received an email last week with the annual Fairmont Parent Survey. Your feedback is valuable and we appreciate you taking the time to provide it to us. When you take the survey, you will be eligible to win $1,000.00 off tuition discount good for the 2012-2013 school year. One winner will be drawn from each campus and all survey participants will be eligible. 

Mable Students Make the Grade 
Our Mable Honor Roll and Director's Honor Roll was announced for the second trimester, and we would like to congratulate our students! See the list of names in the Mable newsletter and see photos from the ceremony on Flickr

Weekly E-Newsletters 

April Lunch Menus 
Contributed by Alyssa, Fairmont Private Schools 

Thursday, April 5

SCHOOL NEWS fairmont teacher makes the teaching channel



Congratulations to Fairmont teacher Mrs. Heather Lopez whose Kindergarten lessons were recently featured on The Teaching Channel! The Teaching Channel was started by the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation as a network for teachers to share great ideas. A production company came to Fairmont last summer to film Mrs. Lopez teaching a C-V-C Phonemics lesson and a Counting Objects & Ordering Numbers lesson.


Both lessons are now available on The Teaching Channel website, which has over 25,000 members, and the videos will air on the show The Teaching Channel Presents on PBS in the fall. We are so proud to have incredible teachers like Mrs. Lopez at Fairmont! 

Contributed by Alyssa, Fairmont Private Schools 

Wednesday, April 4

THE FAIRMONT FIVE spring break day trips


Spring break is just a bunny hop, skip and jump away.  Have you made your plans?  If not, here are some great getaways perfect for some family-friendly day trippin'.

Crystal Cove State Park in Newport Coast--One of my favorite places in the OC for savoring the natural beauty of our California coastline.  Enjoy a long walk on the beach, hike along the coastal nature trails or check out the restored historic district complete with colorful beach cottages, gift shop and museum.  Don't miss lunch or dinner at the Beachcomber for delicious, no-fuss fare and a view that can't be beat!

Aquarium of the Pacific in Long Beach--In keeping with the aquatic theme, visit Long Beach's homage to the Pacific ocean.  Kids will love the playful otters, the shark lagoon and the hands-on animal experiences available every day of the week.

The Flower Fields at Carlsbad Ranch--You don't have to be a plant lover to LOVE this excursion to one of the most colorful places in Southern California this spring. Stroll among 50 acres of Giant Tecolote Ranunculus flowers and be sure to bring your camera!

The Great Park in Irvine--Float 400-feet above the landscape in the Great Park's Balloon ride, open Thursday-Sunday. While you're there, ride the carousel and check out Kids Rock--a play area of misting shade structures, climbing rocks and “underground tunnels."

Catalina Island--Head off-shore for an adventure in Catalina Island.  In addition to the exciting ferry ride, you can enjoy hiking, kayaking, helicopter tours, parasailing, zip-line fun and more in this close-to-home island paradise.


Contributed by Danyelle, Fairmont Private Schools

Tuesday, April 3

ARTS & CRAFTS yarn baskets

These yarn baskets remind me of my mom and all of the thrifty DIY projects that my sisters, brother and I would enjoy as each new holiday rolled around.  It's simple and only requires a few basic materials.  But, it's messy--which can be incredibly cool for your kids and a nightmare for parents if you're not prepared.  So, cover the kitchen table with some newspaper or, better yet, take the crafting outside and enjoy the beautiful spring weather in the process.

Yarn Baskets
complements of eighteen25

Materials:
  • a bowl
  • plastic wrap
  • yarn (i bought the variegated skeins)
  • a few bottles of Elmer's glue
 Instructions:
  1. Turn a bowl upside down and cover with plastic wrap.
  2. Cut strips of yarn about 17 inches long. i don't know how many we cut, but it was a lot.
  3. Soak the yarn in a shallow dish of glue (we added a little bit of water to ours).
  4. Pull out strands and drape over plastic-covered bowl.
  5. After the bowl is covered with yarn, let it dry overnight.
  6. Remove bowl and peel plastic away from strings.
 Photo from eighteen25

Contributed by Danyelle, Fairmont Private Schools

Monday, April 2

BULLETIN BOARD spring has sprung


Spring is here--and that's no April Fool's joke! It's the time of year once again to break out the gardening gloves and start planting. Spring Break is a great time to get the kids involved in gardening, especially with Earth Day just around the corner. We love these earthy inspirations to put us in the springtime mood. Remember, April showers bring May flowers ;)


Contributed by Danyelle & Alyssa