It's a new year and plenty of people are already hard at work making their resolutions a reality. I have a few personal resolutions (lose those last few stubborn pounds of baby weight, read more, exercise...) but when you're a mom, there's no changing your life without changing the life of your family. I love the opportunity a new year affords to take stock of things and begin, again, at the tough work of being the best mom I can be. I'm planning to channel this resolution-making energy into some doable goals for me and my family in 2013. Here are some tips I found helpful from Dr. Phil for making my list of Family Resolutions:
- Take inventory and prioritize. If you want to turn chaos into harmony and rhythm in your household, you have to be willing to challenge everything. Nothing is sacred. You may have to change your lifestyle, rearrange your schedule or drop some of your commitments in order to fully benefit your family. Are your children involved in too many activities? Are you so busy you never have time alone with your spouse? Ask yourself what's really important to you and your family.
- Learn to delegate. Oftentimes, mothers take it all on themselves when their children are old enough to lend a helping hand. You can't do everything. It's admirable, but not realistic. Divide up the labor and responsibilities so you're not so worn out all the time. Give your kids specific tasks that they can each be responsible for. Your kids will appreciate it. It'll make them feel helpful and you'll have more to give them in return.
- Create family rituals. Plan something fun for everyone to look forward to. Pick one night a week for game night. It's the time to de-stress, decompress, relax and have fun together without the TV on or the phone ringing. Do your children like to bake? Bake something new every week. Find special things to do every holiday or birthday. Your kids may roll their eyes, but their ears still work and they'll be grateful for the time together.
- Make each child feel special. Make a commitment to have "dates" with each of your kids. Find one thing you can do that's unique to each child that you don't do with the other kids. Know that you are very important to your children. The time you spend with them is vital to who they become as adults.
- Nurture your relationship with your spouse. One of the most important things you can do for your children is to take care of their mom and dad. Don't stop being friends and lovers because you've become parents. Schedule in date night for just the two of you. Remember why you fell in love in the first place.
Contributed by Danyelle, Fairmont Private Schools
